Dance is Essential!

I mean it sounds so cliche… “you don’t know what you have til it’s gone” … yeah we know that, we’ve heard it a zillion times. What that has come to mean for me right now took on a whole new meaning. Since dancing had become so relevant for me recently, with starting my ballroom lessons in the winter and competing in February, it was like truly living for who I know I am if that makes sense. When I say I think about dancing every single day in one way or another, it’s the truth. My workout music, the choreography that pops into my head, the dancers I follow on social media, the chills I get from a good song… it’s just part of who I have always been.

February 27, 2020 I am competing at the Roosevelt Hotel at the NY Dance Festival. Literally living a dream. A month later, we’re on lockdown, NYC is shutting down, and I am furloughed from my job with Marriott that I love just as much as I love dancing. Blessing or a curse, I have always found safety in productivity. But now… what am I really supposed to do with myself? Piece by piece, what makes me ME begins to change. My Marriott family is severely impacted by the pandemic, the gym closes… and if you know me at all, you know what this does to my mental health… dance studio closes… fear of the unknown, as I sit in the new house I bought 2 months earlier now applying for unemployment.

So day 1 no gym and no work… it’s me, a spare bedroom, a shitty old mirror, a Bluetooth speaker and my Soundcloud playlist. No lie, I was in the worst mood even walking in there. Here goes an attempt at a workout. Figures the first song is a dance remix of Whitney Houston’s “My Love is Your Love”. I start dancing hoping just to burn some calories and make a dent in the 15K steps I like to record on my Apple Watch to appease my OCD. Dancers… feel me here… a minute in I am so lost in the music, the beat, the lyrics... like it’s in control of me. And I needed it more than I knew. I danced so hard I cried. I didn’t stop. I literally couldn't. Dance, cry, dance harder. I think I danced for 45 minutes. I couldn’t stop til there was absolutely nothing left. And it felt friggin amazing. I may not have the studio, and the nightclubs may be closed, but if you’re really a dancer… nothing will takes that from you.

It's now May 19. I dance almost every morning. Beyond grateful for this gift.

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